I Just Want to Get This Best Albums of the Year Thing Done.

I realized it would be exhausting to write up all the really good stuff I heard this year. Also, I am unbelievably lazy. So besides the Silver Jews and Magnetic Fields, here were the best I heard:
Beach House- Devotion
Beach House- Gila
More droney, pretty organ pop from one of the best young bands around.
Bonnie "Prince" Billy- Lie Down in the Light
Bonnie "Prince" Billy- So Everyone (Demo)
People flipped for Fleet Foxes, yet pretty much slept on this album. Yeah, they're different, but they both explore old Americana styles. Billy just doesn't feel like he has to sound like My Morning Jacket.
Deerhunter- Microcastle

Atlas Sound- Let the Blind Lead Those Who Can See but Cannot Feel
Atlas Sound- River Card
Even with its ambient/computer instrumental bits, the album is an honest work with great songs. And really, if you don't like the instrumentals, there's always the Deerhunter album.
The Walkmen- You & Me

Unlike everyone else, I liked A Hundred Miles Off. I like this subdued, less messy album a lot, too.
Unicornicopia- Grace, You're a Dear
Unicornicopia- Before There Were Oceans
A one woman musical about Jesus, heartbreak, and laying in bed with your mom when you're sick.
of Montreal- Skeletal Lamping
of Montreal- Id Engager
A brilliant album that pushes of Montreal's aesthetic to its edge and intersperses ear worm choruses, noise, and sex into one day glow dance party.
My Morning Jacket- Evil Urges
My Morning Jacket- Touch Me, I'm Going to Scream Pt. 2
Lots of people found this album bland, but I found the mix of country rock, Prince, and straight up pop hard to resist.
Murs- Sweet Lord (I have Murs for President, I just haven't listened to it yet)
Click here for the whole album
I love Murs. I love 9th Wonder. They get together for a FREE album that is on par with 3:16 and Murray's Revenge. The summerest of albums.
Micah P. Hinson- Micah P. Hinson And The Red Empire Orchestra
Micah P. Hinson- We Won't Have to Be Lonesome
Hinson is amazing. I don't really know what to say about this album, I guess just listen to it. New Country Romantic.

Stay tuned because later I'll share my pick for album of the year.

Family Fun Video Time

Family Fun Video Time is a feature here at The Art Retard where I post two videos that are so for the kids. So gather the family around the computer and push play.

This video has been one of the top memes of 2008 and is terrifying/hilarious. It's a video about a touching moment between a young girl and her grandfather. Family values!

I'm crying!
The next video:
This video is about justice! And physics! Also, it is history on the internet.

Have a great day!

New Digital Pimp Comic

The Digial Pimps have too many good comics. Now they have a new one based on the lives of people who "act" in video games. It's kind of like a way more realistic ReBoot. I've hesitated to post it even though the first couple of strips were really strong because it's still finding its footing. However, this week's strip is pretty spot on and quite appropriate considering my audience of one (maybe two?). Here it is (click to expand):









I've been an avid reader of Joe Loves Crappy Movies for a couple of years, so I'm pretty excited to see how this turns out.

Seriously Awesome

Rivers Cuomo of Weezer covers what is probably the best song about teenage racing ever, with an a capella group.

"Don't Worry Baby" is Brian Wilson showing Phil Spector what's up-- all swooning teenage love, tight harmonies, and wall of sound. Pretty much whenever vintage Brian Wilson sang a high note, someone somewhere would cry for joy.
The Beach Boys- Don't Worry Baby

I Don't Know What These Are

but they're great.

What's That?

It's of Montreal on Letterman!

Pretty swank I'd say, if we weren't comunicating through letters.

Best Albums of 2008 Part 2: Look Out Mountain, Look Out Sea by Silver Jews

Probably the best thing I discovered this year was the Silver Jews. I'd always been aware of them as attached to Pavement, but I'd never listened to them. It's a good thing then, that I downloaded their song "What is Not but Could Be If". It's a song of beginnings and wonder that hit me while lots of other people were catching Hope Fever. The albums sound is what I would call country, but others would probably disagree. You decide.
Vote or die.
Anyway, the whole album is about drawing a parallel between young people in 1914 and the youth of today. Lead Jew David Berman has said in interviews that this is the first album he has written for younger people. Taking this into account, it's easy to see why some longtime fans were disappointed with this album, however I, being devoid of the baggage of history and context, find it really, really, enjoyable. Which is strange, since this is an album about context and history.
I've since listened to all their other albums and still like this one a lot, for whatever that's worth.
Also, seeing the Jews live was amazing. I can't really explain it. David Berman is a definite hero of mine. Screw Malkmus. Not really, because if I had decided to download Real Emotional Trash, it would probably be on this "list" too.
The Silver Jews- Strange Victory, Strange Defeat

Some Stuff

Wu-Tang Clan are playing Plush in Jacksonville on January 14.
Wu-Tang Clan- C.R.E.A.M.
Morrissey is playing the Florida Theatre in Jacksonville on March 3.
Morrissey- First of the Gang to Die
Pretty exciting!

Here's a for no reason video of Jorma Taccone (of the Lonely Island and the SNL Digital Shorts) dancing to the Arcade Fire in front of... the Arcade Fire:

New Stuff!!

Haven't posted in a few days.
I'm really sorry about that.
Not really though.

******

Guess what!
The Office's Mindy Kaling is in a new web series called "House Poor" where she tries to fill her new house with free stuff. Here's the first (and so far only) episode:

Wasn't that just swell?
Anyway, Kaling also has a shopping blog that at least one of you will enjoy. Scope that thing here.
I'm going to write more stuff soon maybe.

Let's Catch Up

This is the book that I am reading right now.

Also, I won't post the two songs that have leaked from the new Animal Collective album in the last month, because of the Web Sheriff , however "Brothersport" and "My Girls" are both amazing and you should track them down/e-mail me.

Pretty Awesome

Album covers made with Legos
















The Beatles- I'm Only Sleeping















The Velvet Underground- I'll Be Your Mirror















Morrissey- Irish Blood, English Heart















Belle & Sebastian- If You're Feeling Sinister

Here's a Christmas Present

You can download a mini-album I made over the summer here. Five CD-R copies were made for a short set I played Jacksonville for an arts festival. Otherwise, this is the only way to hear it.

Hey Y'all, What's Up?

Finished with exams. Going to sleep. Like sentences with the subjects cut off.
World Peace?


Elvis Costello- You Little Fool
This song was stuck in my head during breakfast. Hope you like it.

Best Albums of 2008 Part 1: Distortion by The Magnetic Fields

This year, Stephin Merritt released his best album since 69 Love Songs. Taking on the sound of the Jesus and Mary Chain, Merritt has cloaked his witty pop songs in waves of distortion. It works surprisingly well and the album sounds wonderful. The uniform sound and length (all the songs are around three minutes) gives the album a nice sense of cohesion. But none of this would matter if the songs weren't so good.
Granted, any album Merritt released would most likely end up on this list of the year's best albums, but it makes it so much sweeter that this album is so good.

The Magnetic Fields- Drive On, Driver
The Magnetic Fields- Zombie Boy

Things I Will Never Care About

MTV Shows

MTV Shows

I've only watched about thirty minutes of The Hills, but these two people were my least favorite. By "least favorite" I mean "The two people who make the rest of the cast seem like Mensa members by comparison". Don't they know everyone else on Earth finds them insufferable? I suppose they will after they read this. Maybe then Whitney and Brody will go into a deep depression when they realize the only reason anyone tolerates them is because of the cameras. Maybe this depression will force them to quit their shows. I guess that means I'm doing everyone in the world a favor by posting this. I know it might be a little premature, but I guess that makes me an American Hero.

Anyway, these are two things I will never care about.

Fake Twitters

There's apparently been someone Twittering as Kanye West when she obviously isn't.
Should I start a fake Twitter? I'd be behind it, but I'd post fake updates. Is this an interesting concept? Could it get me into the Guggenheim Museum?

Should I Send Rough Trade My Demo?

I want to make a name for myself. I want to be a part of something big. That's why I think I should send Rough Trade Records my demo. With music, it's important to have your stuff heard. It's more important to have it heard by the right people. I just want to let people express themselves by putting my songs on mix CDs for their crushes.

Family Fun Video Time

Family Fun Video Time is a new feature here at The Art Retard. This post is dedicated to two extremely family friendly videos I saw today.

The first video is a teaser trailer for a new documentary about every young child's favorite rapper, Lil' Wayne (whaaat??) coming out next year. Basically, Wayne talks, barely coherent, over concert footage and then a song plays. I will still probably watch this. Does this make me a bad person? Hmm? Why won't you look at me?


The next video is a Lonely Island music video that was on SNL this week (Love you Johny Malkovich!) for a song called "Jizz in My Pants." Call the kids in!

Okay, I know this means I'm not an adult if I laugh at this and that the government will take away my right to vote, but gosh dang it, I just can't help it. I think I might enroll in a rehab course to deal with this problem. Immaturity is an addiction, just like anti-Semitism and being a gay pastor. I wonder if I can get credit towards my degree if I go to rehab?

Getting Angry

null - Watch more free videos

Why do people get angry on the TV? Don't they know everyone's going to hear them and they'll be fired/have to make an apology/ have to go to rehab? If I ever meet Meredith Vieira and we just happen to be on national television, you can bet I would (probably try to) keep my cool.

Best Thing In The World Right Now

Tobias Jones wants to store your crap in huge trucks outside his warehouse. Seriously, anything you need to have stored, he'll store it and he means business, just look at this ad.

Here's his website. It's great.

Now that you've laughed a bunch check out the sketch comedy group that put this together.

Here's another video from the same group:

Animal Collective

Animal Collective are set to release their new album early next year but they're already back in the studio recording another album that was conceived as part of a collaborative film with Danny Perez, who directed this great Animal Collective video:


Read the whole story here.

Umm I have an idea...

To help me further understand why I hate Meredith Vieira, I have asked my roommate Dan to contact esteemed scholar Horstense Adams. He sent her my original post and got this reply:

"Men Hate Real Women"
By Hortense Adams, B.A. Smith College, M.A. Wesley, Germain Greer Distinguished Professor of Faux-Lesbian Literature at Sarah Lawerence

You detest Meredith Vieira so much simply because you are afraid of a powerful woman who doesn't feel the need to prove herself to you (a white male with red hair to boot!) Vieira (yes her name is spelled V-I-E-I-R-A but you misspell her name one time in your post as a means of subjugation! evil white male!) gives what many MEN call "soft" interviews. Maybe because she believes the world isn't a cesspool of violence and corruption. Why is it whenever a woman is kind and agreeable she's labled passive and weak? If Vieira went after juglars every morning you'd call her a monster, wouldn't you??( those two question marks mean hostility! White men can never pick up on subtlty)
Vieira doesn't bother with slut skirts like Diane Sawyer or dye her hair slut blonde like Barbara Walters. That's another reason you don't like her. You can't understand the beauty of a woman who chooses to age naturally and act appropriately. It's all bimbos and boobs for you!
- Hortense Adams

Why do I dislike Meredith Vieira so much?

It's not that she's done anything to me or I've found anything she's done offensive. It's just she sits on the Today Show and does stupid, stupid interviews like this one

and this one

It's pandering, mindless stuff and I just hate her for doing them with a smile on her face. Where's her sense of shame? Doesn't she know what she's doing is completely inane?
I guess I can't expect her to be remorseful for the vomit she calls journalism, I mean she used to be on the View.
Even so, this really isn't enough for me to dislike her as much as I do. Why has Meredith Vieira (Edit: touche Mrs. Adams) inspired such animosity in me when more important things like war and Darfur haven't? It seems really small of me and really pathetic and I know I have no good reason to, but I just can't help it.
I hate Meredith Vieira.

Happy Birthday to Twilight Moms

The website Twilight Moms just celebrated its first birthday, so big ups to them for bringing their own brand of weird to the internet. From their about section, "Have you imagined your husband is a vampire (or werewolf) and suddenly have the libido of newlywed again?" The hand that rocks the cradle indeed.

This video is awesome

I can't stop laughing at this video of the Vivian Girls. If I got hurt one person with out repercussion it would not be Vincent Gallo, but if there were two...

Vivian Girls: Bring it On.

Vivian Girls- Tell the World
This is a great song by the Vivian Girls from their self titled album. Kind of creepy

The Soft Boys- I Want to Destroy You
Summing up what the Vivian Girls want to do to Vincent Gallo

Sufjan Stevens- The Vivian Girls Are Visited In The Night By Saint Dargarius And His Squadron Of Benevolent Butterflies
Just because.

Paste interviews Nina Twin

Paste Magazine interviews Nina Barnes, the wife of of Montreal's Kevin Barnes, here.